Who Is Our True Relative?
Who is our real sambandhi? A true relationship must be complete, eternal and unbreakable; worldly relationships fail those conditions; only God satisfies them.
Festival season is around the world is generally the time of the year to spend with friends and relatives. Shri Maharaj Ji has explained the meaning of the English word relative called sambandhi (सम्बंधी, sambandhī) in Sanskrit.
Read on to know what the word means and who is qualified to be called a relative / sambaṃdhī .
According to Sanskrit grammar the word sam-baṃdha (सम्बंध) is a combination of a prefix (upsarg) sam (सम्) and a root verb (dhatu) bandha (बंध) . Prefix sam means complete and eternal and verb bandha means union or connection. Thus, an unbreakable complete union is called sambandha.
We use the word “relative” to refer to all those who are physically related to us. However :
- These relationships last only up until the body is alive. Sometimes they break up before death as well.
- We can only have one type of relationship with one person. For example a father will always be our father. He can never become our mother or sister or son. Then how can we call such relation a thorough and complete relation.
- A sambaṃdhī is a true well-wisher. A little introspection will reveal that all material beings always focus on their own happiness [1], so no-one can be a true well-wisher of anyone else. The Vedas say -
न वा अरे पत्युः कामाय पतिः प्रियो भवति, आत्मनस्तु कामाय पतिः प्रियो भवति ।
“No wife can ever love her husband for his happiness, she loves him for her own happiness. Likewise, no husband can ever love his wife for her happiness, he loves her for his happiness alone. In the same way no son, no father and no other relative can ever love others for the pleasure of others. They love each other only in the hope of getting self-happiness”.
Since everyone is solely focused on getting happiness, when the hope of attaining happiness through other party fades, it causes fights and breakup in relationships. One needs keen observation and deep introspection to realize the authenticity of this eternal fact.
By definition, a true sambandhi is one
- with whom, one has all relationships
- with whom, one is eternally related and
- who has no selfish motive and is our true well-wisher
For every soul, such a relationship exists only with God or we can simply say with Shri Krishna, as
1. He is our all-in-all - Since, we are a fraction of God (ansh) and He is the whole (anshi), all our relationships (father, mother, friend, friend, brother, master, beloved etc.) are only with Him. All the scriptures unanimously proclaim that every jeev is a part of Shri Krishna
ममैवांशो जीवलोके जीवभूतः सनातनः ।
ईश्वर अंश जीव अविनाशी, चेतन अमल सहज सुख राशी ।
रामायण
2. He is always with us - He never has and will never be separated from us because we are the eternal power of Shri Krishna. Due to our actions, we have to roam around in 8.4 million species of life, but He remains with us, whichever form of life we go into. He is the only companion who stays with us even when we go into lower life forms or go to hell for undergoing punishment for our sins.
आनन्दो ब्रह्मेति व्यजानात् । आनन्दाध्येव खल्विमानि भूतानि जायन्ते ।
आनंदेन जातानि जीवन्ति। आनंदं प्रयन्त्यभिसंविशन्ति।।
“Happiness is God, everyone resides in Him, He provides life to the soul, at dissolution everyone will merge back into Him and after God-Realization one will attain Him”.
3. He is our real well-wisher. The Vedas say –
आनन्दो ब्रह्मेति व्यजानात् ।
He is the absolute ocean of profound bliss and is self-complacent. He needs nothing from us. Yet, He creates the world, maintains the world, introduces us in this world and keeps an account of our actions and makes us undergo the fruits of our actions.
4. Gives chances. By giving us a human form, He has given us a chance to attain unlimited divine bliss. He has given the right to perform fruit yielding actions (karma) exclusively to humans. Even celestial Gods do not have this right. In human form, one has the free-will to choose actions – actions that will either entangle you in the material web or actions that can liberate you from the bondage of maya and take you towards the attainment of your goal of achieving divine bliss. That’s why all other forms of life are called Bhog-yoni. Only human form is called Karma-yoni.
5. He keenly observes our thoughts. All this, so that as soon as we accept Him as our true relative and surrender ourselves, He can bestow His divine property and powers upon us. Yes, ALL the property and powers. He does not hold anything back, despite knowing we are nothing but an infinitesimally minute fraction of His.
6. He provides us nourishment in the mother’s womb and upon our birth produces milk in the mother’s body to feed us. As we grow older, he gives us teeth and provisions for a variety of fruits and grains to feed and remain healthy.
7. He provides the same air, water, land, fire etc. to even those who deny His existence or curse Him (e.g. Shishupal, Ravan, Kansa etc) as he does to his surrendered devotees (Tulasi, Soor, Meera etc).
8. After God-realization, He so reveres His devotees that He walks behind them and faithfully serves them, so as to be able to get their foot-dust and purify Himself.
This is a mere glimpse of His numerous acts of mercy. There are uncountable ways in which He graces us.
Now, please contemplate; leaving aside such a benevolent master, father, mother, brother and true relative, one who cares so much of us, one who is ever anxious to grant us His divine bliss for eternity, why should we beg for happiness from worldly relatives, who themselves are yearning for happiness.
So, think why should we NOT celebrate all the festivals as an offering to Shri Krishna alone?
LEARN MORE
